A Reflective Journey of a Loved One's Passing

I remember coming home from a particularly tough day when mom was especially obstinate about whatever we were trying to do for her that day. I pulled into my driveway, turned off the truck, and just sat there for a few minutes leaning back in my seat with my head against the headrest. I let out a sigh as my gaze went to the sky. I was struck by how the sky felt expansive and peaceful yet how small I was in comparison. It struck me oddly that I felt this feeling and I wondered what it meant. Then the epiphany hit me. Since the day I had found out my mother's days were numbered, I gradually diminished, day by day, becoming more compact/emotionally shut down to get through this period. I realized that I could no longer diminish myself any further. The expansiveness of the sky highlighted for me my feeling of smallness. Also, I could no longer hide from the feelings that came with the eventuality of my mother's passing. I had to open and face those feelings and go through the pain of her loss.