I Do Not Want a Fish Finger Sandwich

Being shown the private convenience of the Queen of England in The House of Commons was not the career highlight that Viv had expected. A dazzling profession as a Prima Ballerina had been her plan but having two legs of the same length and width would appear to be a pretty strong prerequisite for a successful livelihood in that arena, not to mention a couple of ballet lessons at least.
What did happen along the way were a random selection of activities which were not anticipated either:
Inter-store "It's a Knockout" on Cable TV
Jumping the queue at the Austria/Slovakian Border Control
Attempted mugging in Bratislava
A West Highland White disgrace on National TV
Acquiring a temporary Iranian Bodyguard
Drinking schnapps in an isolated house in Eskilstuna
LIFE IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU ARE MAKING PLANS